When I decided to pursue a career in nutrition, I think I truly believed that becoming a dietitian after losing weight would make me immune to gaining it back. I thought I was invincible. I would practice what I preached and keep it off for good!
Well, it hasn't been quite so easy.
I've always been open about my personal weight struggles and how much I love to eat -- including pizza, cake, cookies, and the like. This is somewhat unusual for a dietitian (that I am open about my weight issues, and to a lesser degree, that I have trouble staying away from "unhealthy" foods). Do you agree?
In any case, this has been my experience as I've built a network of dietitian friends and colleagues. I've often felt like a misfit among the "food police" and those who seem to effortlessly eat their vegetables and enjoy fruit for dessert.
It has always taken quite a bit of effort for me to plan out healthy meals, avoid temptation, and most of all, resist social pressure to indulge.
After nearly a decade of doing all of those things, it seems that earlier this year I just got sick of it. Although numbers on the scale aren't the best indication of health, they can serve as a benchmark against which to measure backward or forward movement. To give you an idea of my trajectory, I'll present some numbers here for reference.
- At my largest in January 2006, I weighed 190 pounds. At just under 5'4", that put me in the category of obese with a body mass index (BMI) of 32.6 (calculate yours here).
December 2005: Around 180-185 and hadn't quite reached my high weight of 190.
- By August 2006, I had gotten down to around 150. A loss of 40 pounds over 8 months, averaging 5 pounds per month and just over 1 pound per week. To be sure, a slow and steady rate of weight loss that is recommended by health professionals, including dietitians.
June 2006: Around 155 pounds
- By February 2007, I was down to 140. Another 10 pounds, but it took much longer. I should mention that all of this was through a combination of diet and exercise -- no pills or magic bullets. I continued whittling away until I had gotten down to around 120 in the summer of 2009.
March 2007: Around 140 pounds
October 2007: Around 135 pounds
October 2010: Somewhere between 120-125 pounds
November 2011: Around 130 pounds
June 2013: 130-135 pounds
It seems that the straw broke the camel's back at some point, but I can't pinpoint exactly when, why, or how. Maybe after the half marathon in April? Anyway, I had gotten up to 145 this past July. Come August, I found out that I was pregnant.
October 2015: 13 weeks pregnant and 155-160 pounds
I was lucky that I didn't have terrible morning sickness in my first trimester, but eating was the only thing that kept my nausea manageable. Of course, veggies and lean protein weren't my foods of choice, as the very thought of my usual dietary staples turned my stomach. Pizza and potatoes went from "enjoy in moderation" to mainstays.
Exhaustion made it virtually impossible to exercise. Seriously! During that first trimester, I would come home from work and fall asleep by 7:30 pm. Sometimes earlier.
Thanks to the combination of poor eating habits (for which I take full responsibility) and lack of exercise, I am now up to 170-175, of which I can probably only attribute 10-ish pounds to baby.
I know full well that excess weight gain during pregnancy is inadvisable, as it can have an effect on baby and of course, there will be more to lose after giving birth. Now that the morning sickness has passed and my energy levels are back, I have no more excuses.Journaling is one of the most effective tools for weight loss and maintenance and it has worked for me in the past. So in the coming months, I will be keeping myself accountable by tracking my dietary choices and physical activity as a way to prevent further excess weight gain. Then after she arrives (yes, it's a she!), I will share my journey of bouncing back after baby.
Make no mistake, I am NOT trying to lose weight right now. I am shooting for moderate physical activity on 4-5 days per week, with a daily goal of around 2200 calories to support a healthy pregnancy.
Again, I have always been open about my personal weight struggles, and I will continue to be. This is me being authentic and straightforward with those who may see me as a role model. I have always described weight loss and maintenance as a winding road with twists and turns. I have taken a "detour" this year, but at least I'm aware that I've gone astray from my own beaten path and am now taking the necessary steps to find my way back.
Feel free to follow along and/or cheer me on!
Whitney, thanks so much for your support! It's true... with all of the knowledge and training we have, it can still be a challenge to eat right while living well. So glad you'll be following along, let's stay motivated together!
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ReplyDeleteLeia, I personally have greater respect for those who have experienced - and continue to experience - the ups and downs of weight loss. Those who have struggled, and still struggle, garner way more respect from me than those who have never struggled with their weight.....how do they know how I feel, understand my struggles and emotions, if they have never experienced weight issues themselves? As a member of WW - for years - I keep going to the leader who struggles with us. She serves as a reminder that it's a lifetime struggle for most of us, and more importantly - that we are way more than a number on the scale. So kudos - you could have hid behind your computer and never shared, but you didn't. You shared reality and I appreciate you doing so! Beth Reutter
ReplyDeleteAww! Thanks, Beth! I have considered going to WW purely for the social support aspect - where do you attend? I have also considered Overeaters Anonymous as I have occasionally had trouble with binge eating. Not to the point of a diagnosis, but there have been stretches of time where it was happening regularly.
DeleteAnyway, your comment really meant a lot. I know I'm not the only RD with eating issues, and I hope this helps people see that we have struggles like anyone else! I'm willing to be one of the few who actually admits it :)